Along the lines of my 3pm phone call post, I’m going to rattle off the things that dads are really thankful for in light of Thanksgiving. Yes, there are much more important things, but I’ll write about that later. This post is all about self-indulgence and being a “guy’s guy” on Turkey Day, i.e. all about food and sports.
Here goes:
- Gross amounts of food that requires a transition to sweatpants after the third sitting
- Wall to wall, uninterrupted, sports
- Left-overs
- Kids that can occupy themselves
- Wives, mother-in-laws, step-mothers, aunts, girlfriends, sisters and step-sisters that slave in the kitchen and clean up after us.
- Wives, mother-in-laws, step-mothers, aunts, girlfriends, sisters and step-sisters that keep themselves occupied because honestly, we don’t care about the chit chatter. We want to eat, watch sports, take a nap and eat some more.
- Did I mention left overs?
- Being around other guys so you’re protected by the pack, i.e. your wife/girlfriend can’t jump down your throat for having a third plate of food or drinking a cooler full of beer because all the other guys are doing the same thing.
- Deep fried anything — turkey, of course, but anything that’s deep fried is for the win!
- Minimal travel time because it equals to less cranky kids, more food and sports time with the guys.
- Oh, did I mention left overs?
- WARNING ITEM — For the most gender slanted holiday on the planet, i.e. men eat all day and watch sports while women cook and clean. Now, I know it’s not the 1950s any more, but for guys like me who grew up in a society where men are expected to pull their weight around the house (which is fine with me), this is as close to “old school” as we’ll ever get. Enjoy it because you know it’s not going to last and that you’ll be paying for your over indulgence, butt scratching, burping, beer-drinking behavior for 364 more days, until next Thanksgiving.
- And oh yea, left overs.
That is all gents. Enjoy your naps because a cold splash of reality hits you in the face the next day as you start to untangle those stupid Christmas lights.
(sighs)
I'd like to add to a new tradition we're starting in our house this year: ordering Thanksgiving dinner from a good, local restaurant instead of cooking. That way Mom and Dad can both relax and only have to worry about putting dishes in the dishwasher and watching football.
That's weak Binkowski. You need to man-up and go grill something then. Go Lions…oh wait.
How is that weak? It's the epitome of laziness, which is what this blog is all about. You need to fall back in line, son.
Well, I agree on the laziness, but this is your opportunity to be waited on hand and foot…as the wives control the flow of food in-take. Then again, having to do absolutely nothing — both of you — might have it's advantages as well. To me though, it would feel like that last scene in A Christmas Story, when the family is eating at a Chinese food restaraunt…”Fa rah rah rah rah, rah rah rah rah…”
Thanks to #vdogsankle and being the only 'kid' in the family that HAS a kid? I totes get to go the Dad route tomorrow.
Mom & siblings FTW.
I'd like to add to a new tradition we're starting in our house this year: ordering Thanksgiving dinner from a good, local restaurant instead of cooking. That way Mom and Dad can both relax and only have to worry about putting dishes in the dishwasher and watching football.
That's weak Binkowski. You need to man-up and go grill something then. Go Lions…oh wait.
How is that weak? It's the epitome of laziness, which is what this blog is all about. You need to fall back in line, son.
Well, I agree on the laziness, but this is your opportunity to be waited on hand and foot…as the wives control the flow of food in-take. Then again, having to do absolutely nothing — both of you — might have it's advantages as well. To me though, it would feel like that last scene in A Christmas Story, when the family is eating at a Chinese food restaraunt…”Fa rah rah rah rah, rah rah rah rah…”
Thanks to #vdogsankle and being the only 'kid' in the family that HAS a kid? I totes get to go the Dad route tomorrow.
Mom & siblings FTW.
I'd like to add to a new tradition we're starting in our house this year: ordering Thanksgiving dinner from a good, local restaurant instead of cooking. That way Mom and Dad can both relax and only have to worry about putting dishes in the dishwasher and watching football.
That's weak Binkowski. You need to man-up and go grill something then. Go Lions…oh wait.
How is that weak? It's the epitome of laziness, which is what this blog is all about. You need to fall back in line, son.
Well, I agree on the laziness, but this is your opportunity to be waited on hand and foot…as the wives control the flow of food in-take. Then again, having to do absolutely nothing — both of you — might have it's advantages as well. To me though, it would feel like that last scene in A Christmas Story, when the family is eating at a Chinese food restaraunt…”Fa rah rah rah rah, rah rah rah rah…”
Thanks to #vdogsankle and being the only 'kid' in the family that HAS a kid? I totes get to go the Dad route tomorrow.
Mom & siblings FTW.